Should an artist look for a "Sugar Daddy"?

December 4th, 2009 • admin
VO2J5772Dr. L_ltrfltsm
Dear Dr. Lisa- I just graduated from a good college with a degree in fine arts. I’ve been considering hooking up with a “Sugar Daddy” from a site like www.seekingarrangement.com, to help me start my art career. I know if I can just get started, I will make it as an artist quickly, and then I can find someone and get into a real “love” relationship. The reason I’m writing to you is because my best friend is saying she doesn’t want to know me if I do this. We went to college together and now that I have a plan like this, I think she’s jealous. What do you think, how should I handle this with her? I wish I’d never told her, but now she’s been asking me if I’ve signed up on the site. Thanks! -Sugar Baby Dear Baby- You’re missing one important, essential ingredient: R-E-A-L-I-T-Y. Think about this, you will be trading your making art for sex. Which means you’ll be selling your body, not your work. I also get a sense of defensiveness in your self-assurance you “will make it as an artist quickly”. Andt  your sense that your friend is "jealous". If your work was really that good or if you believed it was that good, why would you need an 'art-for-sex' deal? A lot of promising students have galleries and serious interest in their work before they leave school. I suspect that you are trying to take the easy way out. And if you really want to make it as an artist, or in pretty much any successful career, that doesn’t exist. Ask yourself if you are really committed to your work. Are you motivated to make art? Many artists start careers working in galleries, coffee shops, etc. until they can make a living off their work or otherwise. I suggest you look into the backgrounds of many well-known women artists you admire and find some good role models. And I’d be lying if I didn’t acknowledge that being attractive and charming is helpful in furthering ones career, but it won’t sell unworthy work to any intelligent collector. One of the smart choices that you’ve made is in your friend. Hold on to that friend, you’re going to need her. LOVE U! -Dr. Lisa
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Comments Add your own

  1. by davidTue Nov 24, 2009
    5:45 pm

    Dr Lisa,

    You look like a lady who would be wild in bed

  2. by gerryFri Nov 27, 2009
    7:51 pm

    Well, Dr. Lisa, I’m surprised that you’d be so clearly sober and moral in your answer to Sugar Hottie. Did she send any pictures? Maybe she can send some of her work and a picture. Although your answer is ethically correct, the art world I work in is a bit more pragmatic. As someone that works in the art field, I have helped many beautiful artists achieve attention to their art on a fast track – like being in the commuter lane during rush hour, and it’s all about art! The beautiful artist has clear advantages over the plain-faced or flat-chested, and pole-dancing is a value addition to artistic talent! Let’s get real here, there’s gifting, nice boy artists for female dealers, and I can’t count how many wonderful moments shared and careers catapulted because of artists just like Sugar Baby!

  3. by LisaMon Nov 30, 2009
    11:23 am

    I completely agree with you on that point, Gerry, good looking young women or men for that matter have an advantage over the plain looking.

    I’m certain that Sugar Baby is well aware and using this to her advantage as it is. I believe a commitment to being an artist is a difficult and lifelong one.

    I’ve seen many women, who start out being taken care of because of their looks only to become terribly disappointed later in life when their looks fade or they get thrown over for a fresher model. By that time, they believe they’ve made it on their talent, not their looks and are lacking in the emotional resources to cope with the disappointment of both losing their looks and finding out they’re not as talented as they once thought.

    I’m for self-sufficiency. In the long run, you’ll have a lot more freedom.

  4. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:35 pm

    I’m looking, I’m looking… I guess you are now off the list…
    Jennifer Zoellner

  5. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:37 pm

    Between Gerry and Dr. Lisa the answer lies.
    Jennifer Zoellner

  6. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:38 pm

    yup
    Grace Roselli

  7. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:38 pm

    Absolutely! Don’t wait too long!
    Jacqueline Miro

  8. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:39 pm

    Atlas and Ceasar rule this world..Cicero merely decorates it…
    Christopher Lee

  9. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:39 pm

    It would seem we have gone back to that. Or at least faking it is so…
    Jacqueline Miro

  10. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:40 pm

    i’d go 4 a sugarmommy toooooooooo
    Grace Roselli

  11. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:40 pm

    oooh..chile’…
    Christopher Lee

  12. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:40 pm

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-iNtrs1UPY4
    Christopher Lee

  13. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:41 pm

    Sugarmommy sounds fun!
    Jacqueline Miro

  14. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:41 pm

    I can’t believe this.
    Paul Hasegawa Overacker

  15. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:45 pm

    anyone wanna take my sugared up kids that wont freakin sleep so i can like find a sugar adult?
    Grace Roselli

  16. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:46 pm

    Curse of the sugar babies.
    Paul Hasegawa Overacker

  17. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:46 pm

    oh dear…
    Christopher Lee

  18. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:47 pm

    Truth be told art is “play” inside the deathly “seriousness” of the real world…
    Christopher Lee

  19. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:47 pm

    Sugared up babies, and mommies looking for sugarmommies… And Paul doesn’t even need a date anymore! How about babysitting?
    Jacqueline Miro

  20. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:48 pm

    That’s it, I’m hitting the 169 for a martoonie. I just posted Dr. Lisa – and this happens. :) P
    Paul Hasegawa Overacker

  21. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:48 pm

    Paul! You need a sugar mama! Quick, run out and get one.
    Pa Calderone

  22. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:49 pm

    Sugarmommies are taken, sorry. How about a Mamacita?
    Jacqueline Miro

  23. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:50 pm

    I think Jac should get on your couch, Doc. She’d make a patient I’d like to see because she’s just got to have an issue somewhere.
    Paul Hasegawa Overacker

  24. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:51 pm

    If Doctor Lisa is as good as her fame, she might find it. But then again, I find pleasure in outwitting shrinks…
    Jacqueline Miro

  25. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:53 pm

    Bring it on, Jacqueline, there’s no fooling me!
    Dr. Lisa

  26. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:53 pm

    Name date, and weapon of choice!
    Your couch or mine?
    Jacqueline Miro

  27. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:54 pm

    Allright, Shrink Vs Shrinker!
    Paul Hasegawa Overacker

  28. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:54 pm

    Where’s your couch Jacqueline?
    Dr. Lisa

  29. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:55 pm

    I’ve got a very roomy couch in Tribeca
    Jacqueline Miro

  30. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:55 pm

    You’re on. Dr. Lisa goes on location. Let’s mix it up. How’s next Tuesday, Dec.8th?
    Dr.Lisa

  31. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:55 pm

    It’s a deal.
    Pick anytime between 10 and 5p.m. My sugar baby daughter will be in school. We don’t want the sugarbabies when we are talking sugarmommies!
    Jacqueline Miro

  32. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:56 pm

    Almost forgot: 12 to 1:00 p.m. is out….
    I have my own shrink to go outwit!
    Jacqueline Miro

  33. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:56 pm

    How’s 10 am, Tues. Dec.8th?
    Dr.Lisa

  34. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:56 pm

    You got it!
    Jacqueline Miro

  35. by Machiavelli's MistressFri Dec 04, 2009
    4:57 pm

    Choose a daddy who knows nothing about art and can’t block you when you split. You never know who will turn bitter.

    Let him front you the clothes and maybe the social circles and a space to work in (and get laid in, poor kid).

    Fly early after you’ve saved some and you’re set for some slides and perhaps you’ve hooked up with a good agent. Don’t fuck he agent. You never know who will turn bitter.

  36. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    5:33 pm

    From: Spencer Tunick
    Subject: Re: GalleryBeat

    Hi Lisa,
    Do Sugardaddys get foot massages!

  37. by LisaFri Dec 04, 2009
    5:33 pm

    Spencer:

    If you have enough $ to be someone’s Sugardaddy, I guess you get pretty much whatever you want!

    Dr. Lisa

  38. by charlie finchFri Dec 04, 2009
    5:50 pm

    H-O, GR sittin’ in a tree, which one is da other’s sugah daddieeeeeeee?

  39. by paulFri Dec 04, 2009
    11:19 pm

    Pretty good turnout on that post, Doc! And the email update looks and works like a dream. The weather is so bad here in Texas.
    You roc doc…..Hi Spence!

  40. by davidTue Dec 08, 2009
    2:51 pm

    Hey Doc,

    When are you going to answer my email. I keep thinking about your mouth.

  41. by DerekFri Dec 11, 2009
    4:40 pm

    From: Derek Stubbs
    Subject: Re: Spencer’s question.
    Hi Lisa,
    Do Sugardaddys GIVE foot massages?

    I’m looking at you Spencer. I’m looking at you HARD!

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